Archive of posts with tag 'Meditation'

Goal Progress: November

December 1, 2020 • #

We had a hurricane blow up part of a week of productivity around here, but I still limped along with some middling progress on the year’s goals. I’m behind the targets this year late in the game, but I’m still happy with the results. I can still close the gap on the running target, at least.

I’ve been thinking about an idea Patrick O’Shaughnessy wrote about recently on “growth without goals” — setting up systems to be able to pursue and achieve personal growth without having hard numbers on a scoreboard. Using this site as a public accountability tool helps me to keep these top of mind for continued effort. I’ll have to give this some thought as we near the end of 2020 as to how I want to set up my personal growth systems for 2021. I’m thinking an evolution is in order that creates more space for discovery of new interests without interrupting growth in focus areas.

Activity	Progress	Pace	Goal	Plus-Minus
Running	588.6 miles	597 miles	650 miles	-8.02
Meditation	1070 minutes	2607 minutes	3120 minutes	—
Reading	24 books	27.53 books	30 books	-3.53

Reading seems like one that’s particularly absurd to quantify as num_books_read. The dimensions of depth and breath of a “book” are so all over the place that the metric approaches uselessness as a measurement. I’ve tried to avoid selecting material I choose to read around “managing to the metric”; the last thing I want is to end up reading 11 garbage quick reads just to hit an arbitrary number. The purpose is defeated if I were to fall into that trap.

One idea that comes to mind as I’m writing this is selecting target study areas to read about — something like choosing 4 or 5 topic areas I want to dive deeper in and measure to how many of those subjects I learn more about. A trackable tool to keep me honest would be useful, but I’m conscious of falling prey to simply managing what’s easily quantified.

With the downramp in the previous daily posting regimen, I’ve used that time mostly to catch up on a bunch of new ideas cooking in (and about) Roam, and put out a couple of newsletters, issues 4 and 5 of Res Extensa. (Subscribe here!)

It’s been fun to do so far. I’ve landed on this idea for the last couple of following a theme topic rather than a simple digest of links or interesting things. That could be interesting, but there are a lot of great “curator” newsletters out there already. Issue 4’s theme was legibility, from James C. Scott’s epic Seeing Like a State, and issue 5 looked at alternate timelines from a couple of different angles.

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Goal Progress: October

November 1, 2020 • #

October is over already?

At this rate, it’ll be New Years in no time flat.

Anyway, let’s check in on the 2020 goals:

Activity	Progress	Pace	Goal	Plus-Minus
Running	534.25 miles	543 miles	650 miles	-8.90
Meditation	1070 minutes	2607 minutes	3120 minutes	—
Reading	23 books	25.07 books	30 books	-2.07

I made middling progress in areas, like some better runs in the first couple of weeks. Felt good to have some overachieving progress. But then we did a week out of town up in Georgia last week, and my plan to do some trail running didn’t become reality. Between schoolwork (Elyse was still remote-learning from the Georgia countryside), rain, and a surprise tropical storm, much outdoor activity was a challenge, to say the least. We did get in 1 hike, but 5 and 3 year olds aren’t that compatible with long excursions.

I went a full 7 days without running, the longest gap in probably 2 years. While it wasn’t necessarily intentional, it’s probably good for health to get some air space there every now and then.

On the reading side, I finished Stephen Fry’s Mythos, which is his reimagining of the greek myths. I listened to the audio version which is read by the author himself, and if you know any of Fry’s work, you’ll know this is the proper way to consume this book. An outstanding rendition of the tales, more accessible than Edith Hamilton’s Mythology or something like Ovid or Virgil classics.

Ross Douthat’s The Decadent Society was both thought-provoking in its claims, and occasionally frustrating by its pessimism about the state of western culture. I tend to agree with many of Douthat’s views on his “4 horsemen” of decadence: stagnation, sterility, sclerosis, and repetition. I’m skeptical of, but open-minded to, the theories of technical stagnation that you read about in the works of Peter Thiel and others. There’s a compelling case to be made that something is going wrong, and Douthat has an interesting take on where he thinks the issues lie. My skepticism is less around the presence of decadence, decay, or drift than it is around the severity of the issues. It’s a worthwhile and provocative read. Along the same lines I’d highly recommend Yuval Levin’s takes on institutional decline in his book A Time to Build from earlier this year.

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Goal Progress: September 2020

October 1, 2020 • #

For the month of September:

Activity	Progress	Pace	Goal	Plus-Minus
Running	484.26 miles	488 miles	650 miles	-3.69
Meditation	1070 minutes	2342 minutes	3120 minutes	—
Reading	19 books	22.52 books	30 books	-2.52

Good news is I closed the deficit a bit on the running goal, even though it didn’t feel like a particularly productive month there.

COVID makes time fly and crawl simultaneously, through some sort of perverse time distortion. There were just no notable events this month to break up the monotony of online school, Zoom meetings, and tame weekends around the house. Maybe the holidays and better weather we’re entering soon will help get us outside some more.

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Goal Progress: August 2020

September 1, 2020 • #

Another month down of quarantine life.

Activity	Progress	Pace	Goal	Plus-Minus
Running	426.44 miles	435 miles	650 miles	-8.08
Meditation	1070 minutes	2086 minutes	3120 minutes	—
Reading	19 books	20.05 books	30 books	-1.05

Outside of widening our circles a little from shelter to family and one or two friends, we’re still spending most of our time at home or in outdoor activities.

The start of Elyse’s kindergarten over the last couple of weeks really put a dent into anything other than work or supporting her online schoolwork. By the end of the day I’ve been too burned out to do much running or reading at all. It’s also been raining like crazy here over the last week.

I just barely kept it together with the running habit. I just picked up some new running shoes that have me excited to schedule some more longer runs the next couple of weeks.

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Portal →

August 13, 2020 • #

Portal is a simple iOS app that loops ambient sounds, as a sleep, focus, or meditation aid.

I just started using it while working and it’s very nice. It uses a 3-dimensional soundscape that sounds fantastic with nice headphones.

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Goal Progress: July

August 2, 2020 • #

A quick touch on progress for July. I can’t believe it’s already been 5 months since the beginning of the pandemic.

Activity	Progress	Pace	Goal	Plus-Minus
Running	371.27 miles	379 miles	650 miles	-8.05
Meditation	1070 minutes	1821 minutes	3120 minutes	—
Reading	17 books	17.51 books	30 books	-0.51

Nothing that notable this month. Steady upkeep on the running goals, but the summer time in Florida is brutal. Really restricts the scheduling if you can’t do early morning or late evening exercise.

I’ve got a couple of side projects going on that I’ve been pleased with the progress on: a couple of things with the website and some work on personal finances that all feel like good progress.

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Goal Progress: June

July 1, 2020 • #

These updates during the quarantine are weird. In some ways time feels like it’s standing still, in others it feels like it’s flying by. Every day feels mostly the same. Even though some has opened up in our area, we’re still basically in isolation from friends.

Activity	Progress	Pace	Goal	Plus-Minus
Running	317.49 miles	324 miles	650 miles	-6.62
Meditation	1070 minutes	1556 minutes	3120 minutes	—
Reading	15 books	14.96 books	30 books	+0.04

It wasn’t that interesting of a month from a goals perspective. I’m continuing to close the mileage gap that I fell into early in the year. I’m hoping in July to bring that one into the green. Other than that, nothing notable this month other than powering on through this quarantine. Seems like it’s going to last a while longer now.

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Goal Progress: May 2020

June 1, 2020 • #

Just a quick update this month. With the pandemic still going, lockdown in a state of unknown non-committal from any authority, and the madness going on around the nation the past week, all of this seems kinda trivial. I’m sure we’ll power through past it, but I’m just doing my best to keep the habits going. I’m still fortunate to get to plow forward mostly unimpacted by it all.

Activity	Progress	Pace	Goal	Plus-Minus
Running	257.89 miles	272 miles	650 miles	-14.58
Meditation	1070 minutes	1308 minutes	3120 minutes	—
Reading	13 books	12.58 books	30 books	+0.42

I’ve been reading some great books lately. No particular update this time on that front, but From Dawn to Decadence is fantastic, I just started Matt Ridley’s How Innovation Works, and Ra is one of the most interesting fiction works I’ve read.

Meditation hasn’t gotten folded back into the routine yet. I’m going to leave the goal in my updates and plan to get back to it and catch up by year end.

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Goal Progress: April 2020

May 1, 2020 • #

April was the first full calendar month of COVID lockdown. In the beginning of the month I started getting comfortable with the working-from-home setup. I have a decent desk setup and a large master bedroom-slash-office space, which until early March I’d barely used since we moved in. It’s gotten a workout now for 2 months of all-day work. I’ve got one of these adjustable desks that’s nice and wide, with plenty of light in the room, so aside from the zero separation between work and life zones, it’s not too bad.

In this past week though the strain is coming on. Some of it is certainly the 2 months of social separation from anyone (which is especially bad for the kids, which is, in turn, bad for us), but I think working as a distributed company is weird, too. Productivity has still been high, and since we were already about 30% remote anyway, it hasn’t been the huge adjustment for us that it has been for many others.

Let’s look at the goal progress:

Activity	Progress	Pace	Goal	Plus-Minus
Running	198.46 miles	215 miles	650 miles	-16.54
Meditation	1070 minutes	1034 minutes	3120 minutes	+35.7
Reading	11 books	9.95 books	30 books	+1.05

So I fell off the schedule completely in the middle of the month on the meditation practice. I went a few days without doing it, and then just fell apart with consistency. There wasn’t a specific reason other than laziness, and not building it into a morning routine as I had planned. I’m not sure what I’ll do with the practice, but I do intend to get back to it. One thing I’ve still got to get figured out is a more solid morning routine to create the transition from personal to work life more smoothly.

I closed the gap pretty well on the running schedule. The weather’s been unpredictably cool out a lot for Florida spring. We typically have the occasional cooler temperature in April, but this year we had a lot of days in the mid- to upper-70s to work with, which was fantastic for workouts. The kids have been along for the ride on many of them, probably most of them. It helps to get them out of the house; we usually go over the neighborhood bridges and go near some of the water and look for any manatees, fish, and whatnot. With that mild weather there have been some beautiful days to get out lately.

I closed out a bunch of books I’d had in progress for a while. I’ve referenced Martin Gurri’s work a few times here recently, and his The Revolt of the Public is one of the most insightful books I’ve read to explain the modern state of affairs with the culture war, political landscape, social media, and more. It was a lot broader than I’d expected, but highly recommended.

Arthur Koestler’s Darkness at Noon is a classic I’d had on the list for a long time. Very glad I spent the time with it. A grim work of historical fiction about Stalinist Russia and the Great Purge.

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Goal Progress: March

April 1, 2020 • #

So March has wrapped, probably the longest month we’ve had in many years.

The shake-up in schedule, work-life patterns, and disruptions in everything from kids, to family, to day-to-day activities played absolute hell with my progress on goals.

Activity	Progress	Pace	Goal	Plus-Minus
Running	141.04 miles	162 miles	650 miles	-21.01
Meditation	860 minutes	778 minutes	3120 minutes	+82
Reading	6 books	7.48 books	30 books	-1.48

Let’s start with the “okay” news. On the meditation front I’ve been doing alright, but made a decision to switch from using Headspace to Oak. This was partially to shake up what was feeling like a lack of improvement, but I recognize that the tool is not the problem when it comes to disciplined practice of any sort. After reading Tom’s comments on Oak, I decided to give it a shot. I’ve been preferring unguided modes to help work on concentration myself; the cues can actually be a distraction in that way once you know what you’re supposed to be doing. Will see what happens here over the next month with our new normal.

Running was an unmitigated disaster this month. Way too many days off and missed for no particular reason other than the mental disruption in the daily flow. It’s counterintuitive that more time indoors and at home would make less time for running (it really hasn’t), but not having clear breakpoints in the day, plus the kids being home 100% of the time, has made this a difficult adjustment for things like exercise. I’m going to make a concerted effort to do mid-day runs with the kids in tow, even if that means higher quantity of shorter workouts. I’ve got to figure out a way to get a pattern going again.

Books appear behind, but don’t feel that way. I’ve done exactly what I’d intended all along at the start of the year, which was reading longer, deeper books — quality over quantity. I’ve really enjoyed the thread I’ve been following with the history of tech, and I’ve got a few more in the queue I’m looking forward to.

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Goal Progress: February

March 1, 2020 • #

A quick update for February. No big revelations or movements on goals, just slight progress.

Activity	Progress	Pace	Goal	Plus-Minus
Running	97.76 miles	107 miles	650 miles	-9.09
Meditation	600 minutes	513 minutes	3120 minutes	+87
Reading	4 books	4.93 books	30 books	-0.93

I’ve struggled with building longer meditation sessions into my routine. I think the only way it’s going to happen is if I can get a pattern of sitting down in the morning before the kids are up. At night things are just too unpredictable — kids might stay up late, too tired, have to do runs, unmotivated.

Running was a little better than last month. I stayed a bit ahead of the curve through the month to close the deficit a bit, but still had several multi-day-off periods.

As I’d mentioned in my Goals post at the start of the year, I plan to read some deeper books this year so I reduced the total number. A focus on quality material and better retention is the priority. I also have about 6 or 7 in motion right now, which is abnormally high even for me.

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Goal Progress: January

February 2, 2020 • #

The first month of 2020 is already in the books. 31 days blew by already?

It’s been a rollercoaster of a first few weeks, with some vacation at New Years, shot out of a cannon with a reinvigorated team at work, a trip to Miami, and a trip to Jacksonville.

I already fell behind on the targets with all that’s been going on. Once I can fall into a better rhythm with some normalcy in the schedule (which should be happening over the next couple weeks), I think I’ll be fine to catch up.

Activity	Progress	Pace	Goal	Plus-Minus
Running	43.14 miles	55 miles	650 miles	-12.07
Meditation	350 minutes	265 minutes	3120 minutes	+85
Reading	2 books	2.55 books	30 books	-0.55

My running’s been reasonable, if not frequent enough to stay on track with the increased goal over last year.

Reading I intentionally re-prioritized some longer stuff, and I’ve been working through a couple that are great so far, but one in particular leads down all sorts of Wikipedia side trails while reading it.

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Goal Summary: Meditation

December 18, 2019 • #

First up on the year in review is the meditation practice. I started out doing short meditation sessions sort of randomly late last year. I’d only remember to do it occasionally, maybe a couple times a week. While that’s better than zero, it never became a habit or a thing that I would think about consistently. Not to mention that meditation itself is a skill you need to hone over time with experience to get the benefits out of it. Committed practice is the only way it feels useful. This year I set a target to do some meditation each day.

Like many healthy habits, I found it challenging to build up a pattern to reliably sit down for the 10 minutes a day I was targeting. It took months before it felt “normal” to do, even just with the short sessions I was doing.

People say it takes a lot of practice before you can focus with intensity and not have mind-wandering and discomfort immediately, which is absolutely true. If you’ve never sat down, say with a guided meditation app, and tried to do 15 minutes of mindfulness, it’s an interesting experience to be conscious of just how much your mind tends to race all over the place continuously.

Even after a full year of every day practice, I’d still say I don’t feel massively “better” at the skill than in January. I don’t get as uncomfortable as quickly now as I did then, which is good since that’s one of the hardest things to get used to. But I still often feel like I’m fighting even trivial things running around in my head.

I’m glad I could power through and stick with it, but I think my relatively light progress in skill overall is mostly attributable to a high quantity of short sessions. My plan for next year will be raising the per-practice length, but possibly going to only 2 or 3 times per week — perhaps a minimum of 30 minutes each. I’ll think some more about that before setting out into 2020.

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Goal Progress: November

December 1, 2019 • #

This was a busy one. Between the All Hands earlier in the month and the week off for the holidays, those are brutal to maintaining the routine (though great to get a break and spend time with both workmates and family, respectively).

Here are the stats with one month left to go:

Activity	Progress	Pace	Goal	Plus-Minus
Running	574.02 miles	457.53 miles	500 miles	+120.53
Meditation	3503 minutes	3340 minutes	3650 minutes	+163
Reading	51 books	45.75 books	50 books	+5.25

Once I hit the 600 mile mark on the running in the next couple of weeks, I’m planning on taking the rest of the year off to see if I can rehab the foot and ankle pain that’s built up. I’m past the goal line now on a couple of these, which feels good.

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Goal Progress: October

November 1, 2019 • #

The big achievement this month was the culmination of the half marathon training, ending October by finishing my first one.

Activity	Progress	Pace	Goal	Plus-Minus
Running	520.12 miles	416.44 miles	500 miles	+103.68
Meditation	3208 minutes	3040 minutes	3650 minutes	+168
Reading	47 books	41.78 books	50 books	+5.22

The other notable movement was surpassing the 500 mile goal, which happened on this run and I didn’t even realize it at the time. I was able to knock out the mileage goal 2 1/2 months early. Back in March I definitely didn’t expect to be much over the target at all, let alone a full 100 miles beyond the pace mark. At this rate I’m pretty confident in hitting the 600 mile mark, especially with the nicer weather around the corner. I might do one more race in December, likely only a 10 or 15K.

This month I finally finished The Federalist, which I’d put down for a while. I made extensive notes throughout it. I’m looking forward to flipping back through for a refresher soon. Such a phenomenal work to put together such a deep, thoughtful, still-relevant rationale for strong but limited governance.

The other read this month that definitely made my “best of” list for the year was Tracy Kidder’s The Soul of a New Machine. A riveting story of a small team developing an early minicomputer. This story had to be one of the inspirations for Halt and Catch Fire, turning rooms full of geeks into a fast-paced drama.

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Weekend Reading: Baseball Graphics, the Mind Illuminated, and the Crucial Century

October 19, 2019 • #

⚾️ How Many Outs? Baseball Graphics Compared

Some top-notch baseball geekery, with Jason Snell comparing the graphics overlays from Fox, MLB Network, and ESPN’s telecasts. I’ve thought about this, too, but have to give it to the ESPN one, with Fox right up there.

🧘🏽‍♀️ Book Review: The Mind Illuminated

Scott Alexander’s review is an excellent in-depth look at this book on meditation. I’m still making my way through it, but it’s definitely a fantastic soup-to-nuts guide so far.

🇬🇧 The Crucial Century

From an objective observer in the 16th century, what site would have been the best bet to predict the flowering of the Industrial Revolution, based on contemporaneous evidence?

In fact, England in 1550 was not even close to being Europe’s preeminent naval power. It was Hispania, not Britannia, who ruled the waves. Even on maps made in England and for the use of the English government, the ocean off the west coast of England and to the south of Ireland was labelled The Spanish Sea. The foreign maps agreed. The North Sea, too, was the Oceanus Germanicus, or German Sea. It gives an idea of who controlled what. And England of course came close to catastrophe in 1588, when the Spanish decided to launch an invasion – it was largely only stopped by the weather. Despite having always been on an island, English policymakers only seriously began to appreciate Britain’s geographical potential for both defence and commerce in the late sixteenth century.

It took until the mid-17th century for promise to start taking hold in England. By then it’s growth and expansion had begun overtaking its neighbors.

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Goal Progress: September

October 1, 2019 • #

In September the training push continued for the half marathon. I did a personal record 88 miles in the 30 days, for an average of just about 3 miles per day the whole month. Somehow I’m not dead yet, but the aches and pains were there to prove it.

Activity	Progress	Pace	Goal	Plus-Minus
Running	460.88 miles	373.97 miles	500 miles	+86.86
Meditation	2893 minutes	2730 minutes	3650 minutes	+163
Reading	42 books	33.66 books	50 books	+8.34

I think I’ve got the joint, knee, and foot pains to a manageable stage and seem to be turning the corner on that. My post-workout stretching process has been more diligent, shoes improved things, pacing, and proper rest days inserted in there. I’m really looking forward to the weather playing nicely in October and getting the temperatures down, at least a little.

The best books this month were for sure the two short story collections I read: Ted Chiang’s Exhalation and Ken Liu’s The Paper Menagerie. Both of them phenomenal blends of fantasy, speculative fiction, and historical science fiction, with imaginitive and thought-provoking short stories and novellas I’m still thinking about.

We’re moving into the final quarter of the year going strong on all of the goals. By the end of the month I’ll be able to report back on my experiences with the first 13.1 mile race of my running career.

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Goal Progress: August

September 1, 2019 • #

This month I made a concerted effort to kick it into a higher gear with the running. Mid-month was the start of the Strava training plan I’m going to try and follow for race preparation.

Activity	Progress	Pace	Goal	Plus-Minus
Running	372.51 miles	332.88 miles	500 miles	+39.63
Meditation	2563 minutes	2430 minutes	3650 minutes	+158
Reading	36 books	29.96 books	50 books	+6.04

The longer mileage is feeling good. I wasn’t sure what to expect when doing longer times with only single days of recovery in between, but it’s really not bad. The latest few runs have actually felt great cardio-wise right up until the end. The limiters at the moment are the heat (nothing I can really do about that) and some calf muscle and plantar fasciitis pains in the left foot. I’ve been doing lots of stretching and foam-rolling after runs, though, to try and counteract that, which I think is working alright so far. I’m trying to pace my mileage increase so I don’t end up with a real injury that really throws a wrench into the plan.

For books this month the most notable was the finale to Cixin Liu’s Remembrance trilogy, Death’s End. I haven’t had the time to write up many thoughts yet on that series, but it’s up there with the all-time best science fiction, for sure. Another pleasantly surprising read was Simon Winchester’s Pacific, which is a broad history of events and places on the Pacific Ocean since the 1950s. It’s one I plan on writing a longer piece about sometime down the road.

So that’s August in the can. Having pushed the running to 40 miles over the pace mark, I think I should be able to get to +60 at least by end of September, perhaps even higher if weather and health permit.

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Goal Progress: July

August 1, 2019 • #

I had surprisingly good results on goals this July given how much was going on all month.

Activity	Progress	Pace	Goal	Plus-Minus
Running	300.57 miles	290.41 miles	500 miles	+10.16
Meditation	2270 minutes	2120 minutes	3650 minutes	+150
Reading	33 books	26.14 books	50 books	+6.86

On the exercise front, I was able to get the same quantity of runs in even though we started out with the holiday weekend, which always makes sticking to patterns and habits challenging for me. Plus all month long has been exceptionally busy (more than usual) at the office. I’m planning on starting up a more formal training schedule in August in prep for a couple of long races later in the year, so I already tried to incorporate some long runs on the weekend at a lower tempo pace to start building the endurance. I got 46 miles in versus the 42 from June. For the first time this year I officially closed out the month 10 miles ahead of the pace mark.

On a different exercise-related note, I’m trying to bring cycling back into the regimen, mostly for cross-training with the running routine, but also because I enjoy being able to commute to and from the office.

I’ve still been able to squeeze in reading time somehow with a couple of really enjoyable fiction reads in The Dark Forest and Lovecraft’s Call of Cthulhu collection, two that have been in the backlog a long time. Both are well worthy of longer write ups at some point. I’ve just now cracked open Liu’s final installment of that trilogy: Death’s End, which has to be an exciting climax given how original and expansive book two was.

I’m 3/5ths of the way there now on the running target, feeling good. Let’s see how early I can hit all these marks.

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Goal Progress: June

July 1, 2019 • #

So that’s a wrap on the month of June. This was my best month so far in terms of a consistent plan and feeling more productive with staying on target. Even with an out-of-town trip to visit the Cape and Jacksonville for a few days, which threw a brief wrench into the running plan, I was still able to climb enough above the target line get to my highest mark so far.

Activity	Progress	Pace	Goal	Plus-Minus
Running	253.54 miles	247.95 miles	500 miles	+5.59
Meditation	1920 minutes	1810 minutes	3650 minutes	+110
Reading	28 books	22.32 books	50 books	+5.68

At some point mid-month I was actually about +10 miles over the goal line for running, but a 4 or 5 day break for that trip chopped it back down. It’s okay, though, since that’s exactly the point in overachieving for brief periods — creating the flexibility to go off-schedule if needed. I completed the Shore Acres running project, got under contract with a buyer for the old house, and had an all-clear follow up visit last weekend.

We’re halfway through the year and still tracking on all the goals. Let’s see what July’s got in store.

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Goal Progress: May

May 31, 2019 • #

For the second half of the month I got into a good rhythm with every-other-day running. I was even able to push almost 5 miles beyond the pace target to end the month. I started running with the kids again in the jogging stroller, which I haven’t done really at all since Elyse was little (2015-16). It’s good because it gets them out of the house, adds some cargo to push for additional workout, and gives Colette a nice break if I take them when I get home at the end of the day.

Activity	Progress	Pace	Goal	Plus-Minus
Running	211.61 miles	206.85 miles	500 miles	+4.76
Meditation	1595 minutes	1510 minutes	3650 minutes	+85
Reading	22 books	18.62 books	50 books	+3.38

I was able to do more of what I’d talked about doing in previous months with more frequent, shorter runs rather than having to force the longer ones to stay on pace. Consistency is everything when working on a long-term goal like this. The last 8 sessions have been in the 3-4 mile range, which I feel works well right now — a good balance of exercise without taking too much time, so I can still squeeze them in later in the evening.

With my reading I’ve got too many threads open at the moment. I’m bad about getting 5 or 6 books in progress simultaneously, so sometimes it takes me longer to finish them up. This month I read Matthew Walker’s excellent Why We Sleep¹, which is an excellent scientific deep-dive into how sleep works and all of the interplays between sleep quality and other health factors. I’m looking forward to writing up something longer about it here sometime in the next few weeks when I have time.

June has quite a bit lined up both personally and professionally, but I don’t see anything in the way of plowing through on the goals all month.

Check out the 3-part interview series he did with Peter Attia for a good summary of much of his book’s material. ↩

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Goal Progress: April

May 1, 2019 • #

I was able to stay on track this past month toward my 2019 goals.

Activity	Progress	Pace	Goal	Plus-Minus
Running	164.51 miles	164.38 miles	500 miles	+0.13
Meditation	1285 minutes	1200 minutes	3650 minutes	+85
Reading	19 books	14.79 books	50 books	+4.21

We’re still in the throes of prepping our old house for sale, so between that and work at the new house, that’s occupying a good bit of time. I have a goal to have the house listed in the next couple of weeks, so that’ll be a relief to have successfully behind us. With our All Hands early in the month and a trip to San Diego right after, staying the course was a challenge to make the time. I mentioned last month wanting to do a higher volume of shorter runs. I did a bit better, with 11 runs instead of 9. With a more regular schedule I’m sure I could improve further.

Meditation practice has been steady. I’d still like to work in longer sessions, but I feel the only way I’ll get that done is to wake up early and get started before anyone’s up. I’ve tried 20 minute sessions in the evening once or twice, but by then I’m too tired to focus properly and I end up dozing off. Practicing early in the morning will be a challenge, but I’ll give it a shot a few times this month if I can and see how that goes.

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Goal Progress: March

April 1, 2019 • #

Month three is in the books. A seriously eventful month for us, so I’m surprised I was able to stay ahead of the curve.

Activity	Progress	Pace	Goal	Plus-Minus
Running	123.65 miles	123.29 miles	500 miles	+0.36
Meditation	975 minutes	900 minutes	3650 minutes	+75
Reading	15 books	11.1 books	50 books	+3.90

We closed on the new house on the 15th, had an out-of-town trip to Jacksonville right after. Plus there was packing, moving, and child-management throughout. With all that going on I’m surprised I was able to stay on track, particularly with the running. I know last month my main observation about my performance was the fewer, longer runs I was planning to avoid. Turns out I didn’t do a great job. This month I’ll chalk that up as intentional — all of the time commitments this month made me push harder on the days I could run to make sure I could get in the miles and stay on track.

There’s still plenty to be done on the house front, but we’re past the worst of it. For April, I’m going to target more frequent runs in the ballpark of 4 miles and see how that works.

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It’s Not About the Number

March 5, 2019 • #

As I’ve been pushing onward with daily meditation practice on Headspace, the “streak” number has been climbing higher and higher. I have mixed feelings about this in terms of driving motivation. Is the desire to increase a number a healthy way to motivate positive mental health? Is it pushing the right buttons for the right reasons?

Headspace meditation streaks

Headspace founder Andy Puddicombe recently wrote on exactly this topic:

Some people love this feature, viewing it as a source of motivation, a record of accountability, and a badge of honor that reflects their commitment in building a meditation practice. Others can’t stand it, viewing it as a source of anxiety, a reminder of days missed, and an unspoken judgment of their dedication, passion, or priorities.

I’m glad to see them thinking about this, and not just gamifying everything because every other consumer product does. It’s already crossed my mind that the temptation to meditate for the purposes of incrementing a counter rather than for health benefit alone can’t be a healthy one. But Andy (who trained in Tibet) says this structure of practice is common in the Buddhist traditions:

The romantic version of meditative training is often portrayed as one in which time is forgotten, routines are abandoned, and goals are immediately relinquished. Having trained as a monk, I can tell you firsthand that this is anything but the case.

The reality of that lifestyle is a commitment for a certain number of years, and a daily routine set by the clock. We even had a fixed amount of time to complete meditation exercises — a number to which we had to commit. Within this context, we used the concept of run streaks all the time, but it was never about the number; it was a tool to help us deliver on our intention and direction, ensuring we wasted no time and worked towards a singular point, in a clear and steady way.

When I started to think about my personal motivations, I’m definitely motivated by gamification systems and stat tracking. It’s just wired into my brain to feel compelled by data. Sitting here now almost 90 days into a streak, was the outcome of the motivation, whether inherent for its own sake or motivated by being a “game”, worthwhile? Am I at a better place now than I was 3 months ago with the practice? I would say the answer is a resounding “yes”. When I compare the patterns and results of practice now with some time in December, I notice a few impactful differences: it’s always on my mind to remember to sit down and do it, I can get into focus mode more quickly, and I don’t feel the same resistance to practicing I once did — that voice that says “I don’t feel like it”. The routine is much more like clockwork now. So regardless of the means it took to get there, it’s begetting the desired results.

One good reminder is to not get hung up on the number, to not treat it like the front-and-center measure of success:

As long as we are doing our best, that’s all we need to know. We all miss days, and that’s okay. In fact, some people don’t even want to meditate on a daily basis, and that’s okay, too. The important thing is to realize when we have missed a planned session and then continue with the next, a little like noticing when the mind has wandered off before returning to the breath.

While the streak counting does drive me to do the behavior to some degree, what I’d actually rather see is a measure of aggregate momentum — like a score that indicates the “consistency” of practice. It could rise in increments with each session, and decrease slightly when skipped, but wouldn’t drop to zero immediately when a chain is broken. I think that’d be a better balance of keeping the positive driver there. Not deflating the balloon, but still exacting some negative feedback when you fall off the wagon.

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Goal Progress: February

March 1, 2019 • #

We just crossed month number two of the year, so here’s another pulse check on how I’m tracking against some personal goals for 2019. I’m tracking on all fronts, slightly better positioned against the pace marks than I was at the end of January.

Activity	Progress	Pace	Goal	Plus-Minus
Running	84.06 miles	80.82 miles	500 miles	+3.24
Meditation	660 minutes	590 minutes	3650 minutes	+70
Reading	10 books	7.27 books	50 books	+2.73

With meditation practice I’ve widened my plus gap more than last month through some longer sessions. Experimenting with longer 15 or 20 minute sessions has been positive, but I don’t want to push that too far and demotivate the daily routine. I’m also still working out how to best fit that practice into my schedule in a consistent way — inconsistency in the timing (sometimes morning, sometimes night) makes it challenging to do longer sessions.

I came out ahead on the running this month. Not losing a week to illness like I did in January certainly helped, but I was able to do a week-long trip out west without disrupting the routine too much. One thing I’ve fallen into over the last couple weeks is fewer, longer runs rather than frequent, shorter ones. It’s been okay for the most part, but I could see that irregularity breaking up the pacing too much, so I need to do better about an “every other day” general goal. Having 2 or sometimes 3 full days off in there requires 10K+ distances to be able to keep on pace (Bill actually wrote on this topic recently, also). Every so often I have an evening where I go out with an intent to do 3.5 to 4 miles, but end up stretching to 6 just because I feel good. It’s fine for that to happen occasionally, but I don’t want to risk injury. Yesterday I did a 3.5-miler with a half-numb mouth (I had just gotten a filling at the dentist less than an hour before), so that was interesting. But I kept on pace!

There were a couple of great books in my reads for the month. In particular John McPhee’s Coming Into the Country is one I’m looking forward to writing about soon.

I haven’t had much time lately to spend on my cartography projects, but that should change in the next couple of months. I’m still rolling with the daily writing routine. There’s no sign of a shortage of topics to write about. I thought this would be much more challenging than it is, but I guess (like any habit) the key is routine. I tend to write longer-form things in spurts where I’ll add to 3 or 4 posts in one sitting so I gradually can build a backlog of content. Post ideas come to me at all times of day, so having a ubiquitous capture method to always log those somewhere is helpful to keep track. Making the time for writing each evening definitely takes commitment. Getting a bunch of it done while I’m “in the zone” helps to lighten the load on other days where I don’t have the mental bandwidth to write very much. For example, on a long flight a few weeks back I wrote about 3 or 4 posts in one sitting.

In other personal news, we’re under contract for a new house in Shore Acres, which is exciting. Will post more here as that develops!

On to March. We’ve got a visit to Jacksonville, Elyse’s spring break, Disney on Ice, and some other fun things planned.

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Goal Progress: January

February 1, 2019 • #

This is the first year I set some goals on a few things. I’ve never been strongly goal-oriented, so I thought I’d put some stuff down to hold myself accountable and see if it helps build some healthy habits into my routine. Also, I thought it might be fun, as long as the goals were aggressive but attainable.

For the month of January, here’s how things stack up with each area. We’ve got my progress in the first column, the pace mark I should be at to keep on target, the total goal, and “plus-minus” is where I net out against the goal:

Activity	Progress	Pace	Goal	Plus-Minus
Running	41.77 miles	42.47 miles	500 miles	-0.7
Meditation	340 minutes	320 minutes	3650 minutes	+40
Reading	5 books	3.82 books	50 books	+1.18

I ended January technically behind on running, but caught back up with a 4+ miler today.

I’m ahead of the pace on the other fronts. After 1 month it didn’t feel like a stretch to achieve any of them. Meditation is all about building it in and making the time. Running is about committing and not backing out even when I don’t feel like it. And reading more or less comes naturally, but it leaves little time for things like TV and whatnot. The running target has definitely felt the hardest to keep up with. Part of it was getting behind with a head cold the first week, but even without I’ve got to put in about 10 miles per week to make it happen. What that first week did was demonstrate how hard it is to catch back up after going 8 miles or so into the negative. Too many days missed (vacations, illness, other commitments) could really screw me up.

Pushing on into February.

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Spirituality Without Religion

January 31, 2019 • #

As I’ve been trying to bootstrap into a meditation practice, most of my learnings have been from various podcast episode discussions and a couple of books on the topic. My approach thus far hasn’t been to try and dig in way deep, but largely to kickstart a regular routine to form a healthy habit.

Since I already listen to Sam Harris’s podcast, I’d heard good things about his book Waking Up as a nice primer on meditation from a secular perspective — a neuroscientist’s view on the subject as a true contributor to health and well being. The book subtitled “A Guide to Spirituality Without Religion” is just that, an analytical look at the the science and biochemistry of meditation. He does touch on some of the historical background of the various forms of meditation and the religious contexts they originate from. But most of the book is focused on how it works and the neurological benefits of meditation practice.

It’s a quick read, but don’t expect to learn much about how to start a meditation routine.

I enjoyed the memoir aspects of the book. Harris gives some background on his own entrance into the field of study and his experiences in his early days of meditation retreats, trying to break down the benefits of regular practice.

Something I would skip over in any future re-read are the negative counter-argument parts in the final third of the book, railing against “pretenders” in the world of meditation teachers. It’s, of course, important to look out for the “fake enlightened”, either instructors or students touting their own overinflated positions on the practice. But to me this doesn’t differ from any other field of study. Maintaining skepticism and thinking for yourself are critical when approaching any new activity. Perhaps his problem is that with something as abstract and difficult to convey as the art of meditation, pretenders can more easily build followings they don’t deserve.

For anyone getting into meditation like me, it’s a worthy read to get objective opinion on mindfulness and what it’s all about.

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Meditation Progress

January 25, 2019 • #

Since late last year I’ve been keeping up with practicing every day. Mostly 10 minute sessions, but recently I’ve been upping that to 15.

50 days meditation

One important thing I need to work in is how to fit it more consistently into the schedule. I don’t have a set time when I practice; sometimes its before work in the morning, but sometimes also late at night (when falling asleep is a hard competitor). Comfort level is rising with each session. Mindfulness doesn’t feel natural, so the repetition at least makes that part go away a bit.

With the breath focus I’m having the common struggle of mind-wandering while trying to focus attention on breathing. I picked up a book called The Mind Illuminated which I’ve heard great things about as a guide to all phases of the process, but especially to help break through this particular early hurdle.

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Peter Attia and Zubin Damania Conversation

January 23, 2019 • #

I’ve listened to a few of Peter Attia’s The Drive podcast episodes. This one was a stand-out conversation between him and Dr. Zubin Damania. It’s a wide-ranging discussion about the health care system, diet, creativity, and meditation (among other things).

I’ve spent a lot of time right in the thick of the health care system the last couple of years (thankfully with a good experience). Insightful thoughts on what’s wrong inside that ecosystem that ring true from first-hand exposure.

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Self Reliance and Introspection

January 16, 2019 • #

The nearly 2000 year old Meditations by Marcus Aurelius is likely the first ever entry in the “self help” publishing genre. During his last days as Roman Emperor, reigning from 161-180 AD, he wrote the 12 “books” that comprise the Meditations. It’s a personal journal he wrote to himself, never intended for publication, with thoughts, ruminations, reminders, and short stories from his life, all with the objective of serving his future self as a reminder of how to live and act.

There’s not much of a thematic arc from book to book — each numbered paragraph entry largely stands on its own. Some are single, to-the-point declarations, some are longer stories about people in his life, including things he admired about them.

As a practitioner of Stoic philosophy, many of the original players from the Stoic school are mentioned, and their belief system is present throughout. Aurelius was clearly a devout follower of the Stoics, at least later in life. The writing is full of great quips that are helpful for readers of any age or generation to remember what’s important and to direct attention in productive and meaningful ways. Aurelius counsels to live according to a set of principles, avoid distractions, don’t think about what other people think of you, and to maintain a rational mind without letting emotion overcome you. I doubt that he knew what “mindfulness” was in the way we think of it today, or that the Buddhist tradition has, but much of the writing speaks to the act of being “present” in the moment and not dwelling on the things outside of your control — just like the array of mindfulness practices.

“You have power over your mind, not outside events. Realize this, and you will find strength.”

One item of note that I didn’t discover until starting the book was how many varying translations are out there of the original work. It was originally written in Greek and has been translated hundreds of times in various languages over the centuries. I started out reading an older translation (not sure the source) that I found difficult to follow, unnecessarily given that there are more modernized versions. I eventually found the recently published translation by Gregory Hays and started over with his much more readable prose. Contrast the versions and see the simplicity of the text from Hays in this part from Book 2:

Original:

“Why should any of these things that happen externally so much distract thee? Give thyself leisure to learn some good thing and cease roving and wandering to and fro. Thou must also take heed of another kind of wandering, for they are idle in their actions, who toil and labour in this life, and have no certain scope to which to direct all their motions, and desires.”

Hays:

“Do external things distract you? Then make time for yourself to learn something worthwhile; stop letting yourself be pulled in all directions. But make sure you guard against the other kind of confusion. People who labor all their lives but have no purpose to direct every thought and impulse toward are wasting their time—even when hard at work.”

The same idea comes across, without the arcane English that muddies the meaning for the novice modern reader.

I thoroughly enjoyed Meditations and it’s a quick read. It’s a great candidate to become regular reference material for self-reflection and meditation practice.

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Weekend Reading: Railway Logos, Meditation, and the Next Feature Fallacy

December 8, 2018 • #

🔩 The Next Feature Fallacy

The vast majority of features won’t bend the curve. These metrics are terrible, and the Next Feature Fallacy strikes because it’s easy to build new features that don’t target the important parts.

This certainly rings true for me from experience over the years. It turns out that a single feature itself is far from the main problem halting people part way into on-boarding with a product. This falls into the category of focusing on what we know how to do already, rather than what’s important to do. What’s important isn’t necessarily something you’ll know how to approach without hard research and effort.

🧘🏻‍♂️ Why I’m Into Meditation

I’ve been giving Headspace a try to get into a meditation routine over the last couple months. So many people I respect speak highly of building a meditation practice, and it’s pretty easy to do. Focusing for 10 minutes on a single mundane thing (your breathing) is shockingly hard to do. About 40 or 50 10-minute sessions in, I’m finally getting more comfortable with it. I always feel reenergized after.

🚂 Reagan Ray’s Railway Logos

These are all fantastic. I even see my favorite hat represented in there.

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Orbiting the Earth, and Other Zen Videos →

November 8, 2018 • #

This is a 92 minute 4K video taken from the International Space Station as it orbits Earth, in real-time:

If you’ve got an Apple TV and used their “Aerial” screensavers, this’ll look familiar. Most of those ones are drone footage or other things close to the ground, but recently they’ve got a couple done from space. This one is even better, though. It’s mesmerizing to see how small everything looks from this perspective, with no borders or “human” landscapes. Just the Earth and its natural chaos and beauty.

Jason Kottke has a number of other similar videos of meditative scenes like 10 hours of island sounds, an Arctic icebreaker, and a live feed from the front of a frieght train.

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Browse the full archive →

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